So if you want to experience orgasm, having an extra-sensitive clitoris doesn't automatically take that off the table. I do want to say that, while many people with vaginas need clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm, there are some who find they can orgasm without it (often using G-Spot stimulation, which is technically stimulating the internal part of the clitoris but doesn't always get talked about that way). So, you're far from the first person to be in this situation. While some folks find they really enjoy clitoral stimulation, others find it's too intense or painful, or that they can only enjoy it for short stretches before it gets overwhelming. It sounds like you and your boyfriend are doing a great job communicating about all this when you're together, which is awesome! I do feel pleasure from being fingered, but I also really want to orgasm and know what makes me orgasm. He will readily and happily take any suggestion or request I have when it comes to this activity and all he wants is for me to enjoy it. I’ve never particularly had an interest in masturbating, but it makes me feel bad because I feel like I can’t really help my boyfriend out. I have never masturbated on my own before and he is the first person to finger me. I’ve had my legs spasm and I’ve felt a tingling in my vagina while he’s touched me, but I haven’t felt a true “release.” I think that I’ve been close to orgasming, but I’m really not sure if I have yet. In a way, it’s felt so good that it’s been painful? I can’t handle him touching my clitoris for too long at one time. The other day I tried having him rub my clitoris very, very gently, and while that did feel better, I eventually had to have him stop because it felt too overwhelming. I haven’t orgasmed and every time he does rub my clitoris I ask him to alternate between doing that and penetrating me manually. This can help spread that energy of arousal and then, if you feel up to it again, you can try again." She advises waiting 15 to 20 minutes before returning to the genitals - but only if you're still in the mood.Hi! My boyfriend has fingered me a handful of times now, and while I really enjoy the actual penetration aspect of it, every time he rubs my clitoris I feel like it’s too sensitive. Stewart recommends "focusing on a different part of the body so that you can get the blood moving and circulating to the different erogenous zones. So when feeling overstimulation or think you're getting close to it, the best thing to do is slow down and take a break. " move around the most sensitive parts so that you are not directly on the part that will lead them to overstimulation," says Stewart.īut again, the numbness or soreness is almost always normal and will go away. If you're particularly sensitive, Stewart suggests using barriers or layers (like keeping your underwear on while you use a vibrator, for example) to prevent direct genital contact. To avoid overstimulation, definitely use lube during sexual activity to prevent chafing or unnecessary friction on the genitals. But there are ways you can avoid overstimulation, and that starts with understanding how it happens in the first place. If you've experienced overstimulation, it can be frustrating to need to take a break or transition out of sex in the middle of pleasure. Don't worry too much, though - and don't believe the vibrators-are-bad rumors: overstimulation is normal and typically temporary, usually lasting just a couple of minutes. Often, it can feel like you're hypersensitive to touch and have to back off, or you may not feel much of anything. It's called overstimulation or sometimes clit overstimulation - but it's not just from masturbation, as this feeling can happen during internal (vaginal) sex, oral sex, or any kind of ongoing genital contact. But it is possible to experience temporary numbness or even soreness during or after sex. Using a vibrator on your genitals is completely safe. Remember that rumor running around on social media that using a vibrator ( or just masturbating a lot in general) can cause desensitization of the clitoris? Yeah, that's not true.
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